Battles

[Dreamy]

@AuntGlow I'm trying but I'm not catching myself in time before reaching out, or the wait is too long and one thing leads to another. 

Ok, I'll try my best to ride the night out. 

I can't even do my colouring or anything tonight. 

[Dreamy]

Morning @MissinTooth, just checking in to see how you are going? 

[MissinTooth]

@Dreamy had a decent night sleep, so feeling better in that regard, but feeling kinda fluttery at the moment....nervey. I'm not sure if it's the new medication or if it's because I'm feeling a bit anxious about my counselling appointment this arvo.

How are you? 

[Dreamy]

@MissinTooth glad you got a decent sleep. That might be a combination of both i think, hopefully it settles for you soon. 

I'm, well I'm here and that's it for today. 

[AuntGlow]

Good morning @Dreamy! How are you feeling today? 🌞

[Dreamy]

Morning @AuntGlow. I'm not even sure to be honest. Head is a mess, I can't even think properly. I haven't stopped this morning, I've done 2 loads of washing, vacuumed the house, cleaned the bathroom and toilet, done the dishes. Now I'm scared because I don't have anything to do and I don't want to sit down. 

How are you going? 

[Dreamy]

@AuntGlow you know I thought i would be brave and reach out to a friend that supported me last time things were bad like this, she stayed with me when i was in hospital. She said she was going to come to see me today so hence making sure the house looked tidy, then just before the time she said she was going to be here she messages to say she can't make it. This has happened like 5 times in the last few weeks. This is why I don't bother even trying cos now I'm just left hurt. I can't handle being let down when I so desperately just need someone to be there for me. 

[AuntGlow]

Oh gosh... this really would have been upsetting. Feeling let down is awful. I am sorry that your friend wasn't able to make it, but I am also so proud of you for reaching out. 

Have you explored asking her what happened and how her not showing up made you feel? I am just wondering if there's something more going on for her? @Dreamy 

[Dreamy]

@AuntGlow the only thing going on is I'm not important enough for her to make the time. This isn't the first time, it's been many, many times over the last several years. I don't know why I even bothered when I knew what was going to happen, it's always just some excuse as to why she can't come. She goes to see all of her other friends, I'm just insignificant and not worth her time or anyone's time. 

[AuntGlow]

I can understand why it might feel this way right now. It's really disheartening being let down by someone over and over again... What would you say to her, if you could share anything about how you're feeling? @Dreamy 💛