Hiya @GlussDecaf and welcome to the forums!!
Putting my hand up! Me! I got diagnosed with ADHD later in life! Well, 27 y.o. for me but still something requiring a lot of reflection and adjustment! More than happy to chat about my experiences - I've done so before here for a Q&A event, and my ramblings got turned into a wee blog post if you wanted to have a gander! (Also just for the record, SANE have included an image of a person at the top of the blog post - it's not me, so no anonymity rules broken 🤣)
We've also got a thread for ADHDers to hang out, share tips, ask questions, and chat to other ADHDers, you can come join us here: Wait what did I come into this thread for again? Oh right, ADHD!
(That link will take you to the first page of the thread. The last page/most recent discussion is here)
@GlussDecaf wrote:
How did your life change after the diagnosis?,
what steps have you put in place to live better with ADHD?
There are a few areas where I’m struggling at the moment:
1. Getting enough sleep. Often get carried away with what I am working on and before I know it, it’s 3 am!
2. Not just putting a million things on a to do list - following up for a day or two but not following up every day
3. Transitioning from one activity to another
4. Stopping that negative self destructive blaming voice in my head.
5. Ignoring the alarms on my phone!!!!
Happy to ramble some answers at ya!
First off, I think the most significant change to my life was the ability to reframe my behaviours/look at them through a different lens. I used to be sooooo bogged down in self-loathing, and a big part of it was due to feeling I was somehow weak, incapable, and just generally inferior to others who seemed to be able to cope just fine with the same sorta stuff. Since one of the super fun symptoms of ADHD is difficulty regulating emotions, I would cry over the smallest stuff, confuse my friends with big, volatile reactions to seemingly small issues, stuff like that. Being able to re-examine these aspects of myself, and see them not as personal failings but simply a different way of operating, was absolutely life-changing.
1. Oh big mood! Getting caught up in hyperfocus can be really fun, but my sleep is also a big struggle! I try to set alarms to prompt me about when it's time to wind down for the night... whether or not I actually adhere to the alarms is a different story! But it can help, especially when dealing with time-blindness.
2. I struggle with maintaining a to-do list, for sure! I think it does help to have a bit of external structure - I'm trying out a new app at the moment called 'Structured', got recommended to me by another ADHDer. Or you can try to create a routine (like 'every Monday evening I will sit down and revise/update my to-do list) that helps prompt you - takes time to build new habits but once they stick, it's much easier!
3. Transitions are notoriously difficult! Something I find helpful is using a smart watch - another thing recommended to me by other ADHDers! And it is actually super helpful, because I can set timers for everything! Great for reminding me to take my meds haha. But it can also help by interrupting the task you're locked onto, like if you wanna work on something in the morning, but have a 3pm appt, you could set a timer for like two three hours, to remind you to stop so you can get ready. You can probs do timers on your phone too, I like the watch because it's always attached to me so I don't miss stuff just cos I left my phone in another room.
4. This one is tricky, but one I'm sure pretty much everyone here can relate to! Having a tough, overly intense inner critic can be super debilitating, for sure. For me, some things that helped were to learn to recognise 'where' the voice is actually coming from (e.g. is my inner critic truly a reflection of my needs or is it my parents/teachers/etc.'s voice, repeating their unfair expectations of me), and learn how to talk to it, i.e. to be able to self-reassure. It's a skill, like most things in recovery, and takes some practice! It can be super challenging though and I'd definitely recommend getting the aid of a therapist or similar.
5. Ahh... hahaha if you figure something out, let me know!! 😅
